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Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.
Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform: he only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder.
C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.
The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
I don\'t believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.
I\'m not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.
I\'ve always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
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C++: an octopus made by nailing extra legs onto a dog
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: \'Can I help, sir?\' \'No thanks,\' says the blind bloke. \'Just looking.\'
Finagle\'s Law of Dynamic Negatives: Anything that can go wrong, will -- at the worst possible moment.
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
I know that there are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that.
I am not young enough to know everything.
Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.
A model is done when nothing else can be taken out.
Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
I\'d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn\'t.
Build a man a fire, and he\'ll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he\'ll be warm for the rest of his life.
A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.
Distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes.
Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
Biologically speaking, if something bites you it\'s more likely to be female.
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.
Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.
UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.
Build a man a fire, and he\'ll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he\'ll be warm for the rest of his life.
The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
Computer /nm./: a device designed to speed and automate errors.
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
Only one man ever understood me, and he didn\'t understand me.
The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one\'s work is terribly important.
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
It is the job of thinking people not to be on the side of the executioners.
In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.
The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney...
Machine. Unexpectedly, I\'d invented a time
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses, not zebras.
Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
Hi there, what\'s up you guys???
If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.
Modern capitalism is not about free markets, it is about building sufficient mass that the market gravitationally collapses around you.
We are Dyslexia of Borg. Fusistance is retile. Your ass will be laminated.
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Gigerenzer\'s Law of Indispensable Ignorance: The world cannot function without partially ignorant people.
Don\'t be so humble - you are not that great.
If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.
If everything seems under control, you\'re just not going fast enough.
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.
A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.
A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.
Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.
I\'m not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.
Programming is one of the most difficult branches of applied mathematics; the poorer mathematicians had better remain pure mathematicians.
Raymond\'s Law of Software: Given a sufficiently large number of eyeballs, all bugs are shallow.
I\'m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
The purpose of computing is not numbers but insight.
I\'ve had a wonderful time, but this wasn\'t it.
Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.
Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.
Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.
Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.
If Tyranny and Oppression come to this land, it will be in the guise of fighting a foreign enemy.
If it weren\'t for electricity we\'d all be watching television by candlelight.
Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog, it\'s too dark to read.
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I\'m not there, I go to work.
The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There\'s also a negative side
Emulate your heros, but don\'t carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.
I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.
I\'m very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.
The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
In Germany they first came for the Communists, and I didn\'t speak up because I wasn\'t a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn\'t speak up because I wasn\'t a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn\'t speak up because I wasn\'t a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn\'t speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me - and by that time no one was left to speak up.
I\'m living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.
If it wasn\'t for lawyers, we wouldn\'t need them.
Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.
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A man can\'t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
Computers are useless; they can only give you answers.
Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn\'t over until everyone gets their cookies.
It\'s dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that\'s successful enough to require a large and complex set of software
A man can\'t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
War doesn\'t make boys men, it makes men dead.
But at my back I always hear Time\'s winged chariot hurrying near.
I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don\'t need.
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
Under conditions of competition, standards are set by the morally least reputable agent.
War doesn\'t make boys men, it makes men dead.
... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
Our children are not born to hate, they are raised to hate.
Louis Pasteur\'s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.
Happiness is good health and a bad memory.
To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
If you can\'t get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you\'d best teach it to dance.
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Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.
I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
I have four children which is not bad considering I\'m not a Catholic.
Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.
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If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.
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I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.
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I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
It\'s not the size of the dog in the fight, it\'s the size of the fight in the dog.
For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.
I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
I\'m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
Happiness is good health and a bad memory.
The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that\'s ok because you\'ll be a mile away from him and you\'ll have his shoes.
Before the war is ended, the war party assumes the divine right to denounce and silence all opposition to war as unpatriotic and cowardly.
There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal.
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
I don\'t approve of political jokes... I\'ve seen too many of them get elected.
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn\'t cure.
It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
Far too many development shops are run by fools who succeed despite their many failings.
Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
If you can count your money, you don\'t have a billion dollars.
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
Oh for pity\'s sake. HERE. Two pebbles. Two more pebbles. FOUR pebbles. What is WRONG with you people?
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
I wouldn\'t mind dying - it\'s the business of having to stay dead that scares the shit out of me.
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Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box.
If quantum physics doesn\'t confuse you then you don\'t understand it.
A man\'s only as old as the woman he feels.
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
If you can\'t get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you\'d best teach it to dance.
Honolulu, it\'s got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, and sharks for the wife\'s mother.
There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal.
The cynics are right nine times out of ten.
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All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
I know that there are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that.
My current job sucks so hard, black holes are going green with envy.
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Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?
Don\'t knock masturbation, it\'s sex with someone I love .
Honolulu, it\'s got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, and sharks for the wife\'s mother.
Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that\'s how dogs spend their lives.
Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.
Sailors ought never to go to church. They ought to go to hell, where it is much more comfortable.
I don\'t know anything about music. In my line you don\'t have to.
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Having the source code is the difference between buying a house and renting an apartment.
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don\'t seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn\'t work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.
It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
Happiness is good health and a bad memory.
Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.
The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.
Against stupidity the (very) gods themselves contend in vain
There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/26/(Thu) 10:27
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